strong cookie.

over and over.

2012-01-11T17:22:00.002-05:00

On rereading (which I have mentioned before). I just love this quote:

I’ve been reading the old books, books that I’ve read before. The first time you read a book, you don’t read it at all carefully; you just read it for the story. You have to keep rereading.

from an interview with P.G. Wodehouse

2011 in Strong Cookie

2011-12-31T20:12:00.000-05:00

For 899 (2 years, 5 months and 18 days, if you want the breakdown), I was a freelancer. I can wax poetic about all that I learned and accomplished in that time, but ultimately, 2011 was the year in which I finally was able to settle down somewhere. Which is most important, even if it did almost swallow this blog whole.

We moved, again. A mere few blocks away from the previous place, which I would have to strongly argue against. So much work, for such a short distance. But the new place has a backyard and that is just really awesome.

I turned 30, which is crazy. I don't feel 30. . .whatever that is supposed to feel like.

Let's do this 2012. I'm ready for you. Sparkly dresses and smiles all the way.

book list #37 - if you knew then. . .

2011-12-31T15:07:00.000-05:00

If You Knew Then What I Know Now by Ryan Van Meter is beautiful.

Beautifully, honestly written and highly recommended.

The stories are heart breaking in good ways and bad ways. I have a soft spot for creative non-fiction, and this book gets to me in all the most perfect way.

Buy this. Seriously. I can't imagine you regretting it.

book list #36 - lucky peach (sweet spot)

2011-12-31T15:02:00.001-05:00

Have I mentioned how much I love Lucky Peach? The second issue came out and just like the first one it was dense and awesome. There is A LOT to read. There is an entire section about Christina Tosi with some of her recipes, which, if you've never had a Milk Bar Corn Cookie, well, I feel badly for you.

(Side note: I gave my godson's mother the cookbook for Christmas. Totally self-serving)

By the way, if Lucky Peach ever needs a freelance photo editor, they should definitely call me.

2011, in pictures.

2011-12-28T08:44:00.000-05:00

I thought I would do this throughout the year. I was wrong.

January turned out to be the only month I pulled it off.

February: doctor patient confidentiality & a sparkly dress at a wedding

March: love, tutus, & skipping

April: finished products, a Frog takes pictures, spring blooms, & birthdays

May: desktop, belle of the ball, 40 for ggg, & dancing diptych

June: officially official, place of honor, & forever home screen

July: rooftop fireworks, reunion kisses, & moving

August: new home, thirty, & hurricane

September: injury, swinging, & a special request by a special lady

October: wedding day, morning light & instagram madness

November: marvin, late nights, & dogs

December: bread & holiday spirit

Okay, 2012, I'm ready. . .

book list #34 (plus): a year of The New Yorker

2011-12-26T06:36:00.000-05:00

I've written about my love/obsession for The New Yorker before. I never know how to count The New Yorker to my final book list tally. Combined, a year of them equal much more than a book, but how much more? Does it equal 5? 10? I have no clue.

When I am done reading it, I always flag the things I responded to. This year, I've decided to overshare with you. Enjoy! (There will be a separate photography post before the end of the year)

Funnily enough, I already wrote about the first issue of the year here.

I became fascinated by the possible extinction of bananas, and the science of human nature.

I haven't yet gotten around to reading Gabrielle Hamilton's book, but this personal history piece leads me to believe that I will ultimately enjoy it.

This piece on reducing health-care costs was a lot more interesting than it sounds.

I love so much of what Nancy Franklin wrote this year, beginning with her write up of the OWN Network through her piece on Homeland (which you should be watching). Although I am really excited to see what Emily brings to the table.

It's highly unlikely that I would have to explain to the readers of this blog why I would like something that discusses The Feminine Mystique.

Since I love Rent the Runway, I had a personal investment in Patricia Marx on consumer rental services.

I've been following the concussions story for a while, so I was interested in this update by Ben McGrath, along with his profile of the guy who draws all the illustrations for the "for dummies" guides.

I love Elizabeth, and I enjoyed reading her take on Amy Chua's "Tiger" parenting.

The February 7th issue had a lot of awesomeness including - the peanut puzzle, crush point which is well-written to the point of inducing anxiety, a devastating personal history, and this profile of Guillermo del Toro which is sooooooo good.

I became worried for Lawrence Wright after he wrote this extensive piece about Paul Haggis, a former Scientologist. I was obsessed with the fact that the Church of Scientology clearly verified NOTHING for the poor New Yorker fact-checkers. It was such a strong (and long) piece that you could almost miss Tina Fey on juggling, or Andy-Pant's favorite writer, Gladwell taking a look at the college ranking systems.

While on the subject of Gladwell, I really enjoyed both of these technology-themed pieces, especially the one about the late, great Mr. Jobs.

I'd be remiss not to do a round-up of all of Sasha Frere-Jones profiles and articles - beginning with Bruno Mars, followed by the women of pop, and ending with Drake. I'll spare you the additional linkage, but he is also a dope blogger.

One of my favorite New Yorker writers is Adam Gopnik, and he did not disappoint this year. He wrote about giving up dessert (craziness!), the internet and the abundance of information we download into our brains, he wrote about learning to draw (which I have always wanted to do), this article which I am STILL obsessing over and recommending about owning dogs and how they run our lives. He wrote about the dioramas at my favorite museum, and about one of my favorite books from childhood. Most recently, he wrote about the history of the turkey, and young adult fantasy books. Basically, if you are reading this Adam, we really should be friends. E-mail me!

The New Yorker always handles grief in really interesting ways, like with Meghan O'Rourke writing about the death of her mother, or Aleksandar Hemon on his youngest daughter's illness.

Certain people I know have some issues with Kelefah, but these profiles of Ulli Rimkus (bar owner) and Aida Batlle (coffee grower) were well-written pieces about interesting women. Also, this was a wild mystery story that was too crazy NOT to be true.

As a girl who loves futbol, this was awesome and REAL. For another set of personal reason, this profile of a young chess phenom was wildly fascinating to me.

In the March 28th issue there was a style focus that had a profile of the woman who invented Spanx and Mr. Louboutin himself by Lauren Collins. (Later in the year, Collins wrote about IKEA and this very funny piece about a woman who collects wifi names.) Also about fashion in October, bulletproofing!

Reading about Anna Faris made me like her more as an actress. I loved reading about Andrew Stanton who is the lead writer behind Toy Story, Finding Nemo, and Wall-E. Anthony Lane on the Pixar studio later in the year was equally satisfying,

Anything New York-related is always a hit for me, so Widdicombe pieces like this one about the executive director of the New York Taxi Workers Alliance and Bloomberg visiting Zucotti were highlights. (Widdicombe also wrote about Taylor Swift. Profiles about Swift are endlessly entertaining to me because of the fact that NO ONE can seem to make her break form. Ever.) Trunks in the deep recesses of Stuy Town? Yes please! Follow that cab? YES!

I should have been a neuroscientist because articles like this one linger in my brain longer than others. Another job I should have had? CIA. Confidential informants are prettttty cool.

This is an unbelievable article about people with mental illness who reject their diagnosis framed around one particular, devastating case. Equally unbelievable are these women (mostly) who get lured into war zones to work by the U.S.

I love Jhumpa. Strong women rock - Jill, especially. Also, French feminists. Daphne Guinness is not a feminist, but still interesting to read about.

I respect Thomas Struth even more after reading this profile. I hope to work with JR someday.

I was personally interested in Jerome Groopman's piece about preemies, since my sister was almost 2 months premature.

Universe, please don't ever let me have to online date. Maybe I should just get off of the social network? Or brand Strong Cookie?

I read this three times the week it ran. Not suprising.

Unfortunately, this is not about Mario or Luigi, but I still thought it was interesting.

How to be Good is all about morality.

November 14th was another strong issue - starting with the previously mentioned Gladwell on Jobs, McPhee on his progression as a writer, Lepore on Planned Parenthood, Schmidle on an insane murder trial times two,

Another topic that always wins with me is food:
Starting with the food issue
Eric Ripert's knives
Vendy Awards (Go Korila!)
eating bugs
how acai happened
true grit

They ended the year with the power of nothing, a massacre in Jamaica, and a record collector.

So there is all of this and I barely touched on Talk of the Town, Shouts & Murmurs, or Fiction. There is only so much linking a girl can do!

book list #33 - The Governor

2011-12-23T19:46:00.000-05:00

The Governor is one of the scariest villains of all time.

There, I said it.

I'm not going to lie, but I definitely had some really twisted nightmares after reading The Walking Dead when the Gov was featured.

I was really excited to read that Kirkman was planning on doing a few novelizations of characters who show up in the series who deserve/demand more back story. The Gov is clearly one of the characters. (Seriously? Am I STILL convincing you to read these?)

The book is utterly disturbing, which is not at all surprising.

I stupidly, mistakenly read it while in the Berkshires for the weekend. The completely quiet, pitch black, boonies that is Williamstown.

I need to learn how to choose my reading material more appropriately based on location.

His background, his origin story, is as shocking as his characterization in the graphic novels.

obsessions of '11

2011-12-22T07:00:00.000-05:00

I am never going to be one of those people who likes quirky, obscure music. I used to feel like I should somehow apologize for that, but guess what?

I don't care. I LOVE POP MUSIC. I love cheesy, catchy pop music. Some of it happens to be good, and some of it is not-so-much, but I still will play it 30 times in a row.

Here is my list of songs I played at least 30 times in a row.

1. "Bright Lights Bigger City" by Cee Lo Green

I ended last year with Cee Lo, and I feel like it would be disingenuous to say I didn't begin the year with him as well. His album was on repeat for quite a while.

2. "Little Lion Man" by Mumford and Sons

Not gonna lie, I am kind of into this whole album, but the reason I got into it in the first place was because of this song.

3. "Hurricane Drunk" by Florence + The Machine

Oh boy. This album, 2nd only to the next one on the list. ON REPEAT.

4. Rolling in the Deep/Someone like You by Adele

Was there anyone who didn't listen to this on repeat all year? No. Didn't think so. In fact, I basically STILL have not stopped listening to this album.

The "Someone Like You" performance I've posted down there. "Sheeeeeeeeet" - Clay Davis, The Wire

6. "Havana City" by Los Van Van

It occurs to me, based on the fact that this is number 6 on my list, that my ordering system is a little wonky. I first heard this song at a wedding in February. I immediately fell in love and promptly listened to this song a hundred million times, salsa-ing around every time it came on. It is so damn smooth.

7. "No one's Gonna love you" by Cee Lo Green

The video below is actually by Band of Horses, but Cee Lo covers this song on his album and it is just a smart move. It's classic jam.

8. "Blue Jeans" by Lana del Rey

This girl has a sexy voice and this song is sexy and it's just sexysexysexytime.

9. "Devil Town"

You guys. . .why did I wait so long to get back into Friday Night Lights? It ended (boo!) on such a great note. Coach and Mrs. Coach has the best marriage on teevee. I love them. I love Tim Riggins forever. Matt Saracen is the best.

CLEAR EYES, FULL HEARTS, CAN'T LOSE.

I couldn't NOT include this song. Let's be serious.

10. "Otis" by Jay-Z and Kanye

Truthiness - I ignored this album for a long time for some fairly immature reasons, but I couldn't deny "Otis". You cannot go wrong sampling the great Otis Redding, and this song is fire-y.

11. "I need a dolla" by Aloe Blacc

I watch "Jeantourage" (TM Emily Nussbaum) and while the show leaves a lot to be desired, the opening song/credits do not. I can listen to them every time. (I am often watching the episodes in chunks).

It's a great soundtrack for walking the streets of New York.

12. "Shake it Out" by Florence + The Machine

It is not my fault that she is back on this list! The album was clearly very poorly timed.

I love this. I love the acoustic version. I love her voice. I love her lyrics. I love her style.

*13. "Stomp" by The Roots
Technically, I have not had this album on my iphone long enough to reallllly be obsessed with it, and I should just save it for track 1 of NEXT year's list, but I can't help it. This is the clear forerunner for me to be my obsession.

Plus, it's The Legendary Roots Crew!

Previous years - 2010, 2009, 2008

book list #32 - Gotham

2011-12-21T19:23:00.000-05:00

I am a sucker for Gotham.

I entered the comic world through DC, and no other books ever consistently keep me entertained the way books set in Gotham do.

Black Mirror is no exception.

*SPOILER ALERT*

In this version of the Gotham-universe, Dick Grayson (the first Robin) is now Batman. This is an important distinction because Dick is a very different type of Batman. I should stop writing this second because I am in dangerous nerdy territory right now and I may never recover.

Anyway, I've always loved Dick Grayson, back when he was Nightwing, so him as Batman is pretty awesome. The book also includes my ULTIMATE girl, Barbara Gordon (also known as the first Batgirl who Joker paralyzes)(Sweet Lord, I am a nerd).

Look, I just need to stop because this is too embarrassing, but I highly recommend the book, okay?

book list #31 - Walking Dead 13 & 14

2011-12-20T07:21:00.000-05:00

This season, people have been complaining incessantly about The Walking Dead tv show.

They say it moves too slowly, they say that there aren't enough zombies. (Don't you love my use of the universal "they"? Who are these people?)

I feel like, from my view, these are people who clearly haven't read the books. Yes, ultimately, The Walking Dead is about zombies, but what it is really about, is what people do when everything around them is gone. Everything they knew, every social structure, everything that was familiar, is all gone. How do you react? That's The Walking Dead.

The comic books are clearly much farther ahead and books 13 and 14 are equally dark and twisty.

These two collections delve even more into the human psychology of it all as the group settles into a gated community situation.

I won't give much away, but if you've been reading this long, these don't disappoint. If you haven't started reading - get thee to book 1.

book list #30 - newspaper people

2011-12-19T07:09:00.000-05:00

The second book for TBC was The Imperfectionists. Again, I knew nothing about the book prior to reading it, and was pleasantly surprised to discover it was about newspaper people.

I say newspaper people in lieu of journalists because the characters in these books are stereotypes. The type of stereotypes that are uncomfortably familiar. The cranky old copy editor, the quirky fact checker, the type-a financial officer, etc. The characters are all made up of bits of people who I have met before, who I have worked with before.

The Imperfectionists is dark and completely entertaining. The characters lives weave together, but not in a corny Love Actually way (well, not until the end anyway).

As with any short fiction, some of the stories were stronger than others, but as a whole the book is a great deal of fun.

book list #29 - Maira is the best

2011-12-14T09:59:00.000-05:00

When you are in the industry that I am in sometimes the world feels very very small.

In this case it became stamp-sized.

When I saw the cover of Michael Pollan's illustrated Food Rules, I knew instantly that I knew the cover subject. Lo and behold, Bon Appetit did a blog post on it. She is my former colleague.

I have a long history of being obsessed with Maira and her art.

When The Principles of Uncertainty had it's big release party (circa 2007), I made a joke to a very good friend of mine that he should just pick up a print for me while he was there. This lead to an almost year-long joke in which he told me Maira was working on it, and he was special ordering the wood and glass for the frame, etc.

On my birthday the next year, I went out to lunch and then came back to work to find this at my desk:

in that was this:

which was on the back of this:

which is a copy of the print I kept asking for. . .directly out of the book. One of the best presents ever. It sits on my current desk. People never get tired of wondering what the hell they are looking at.

[Side note: if you ever want to buy me a print that one (above) and this one (below) would be my choices-]

This is a very very long way of saying that Luise is living my dream by being the cover.

Michael Pollan's book is awesomely illustrated by the incredible Maira Kalman. You should have it, you should read it, you should appreciate it, you should try to follow as many the rules as possible, and you should enjoy all the beautiful art.

book list #28 - TBC begins

2011-12-12T08:59:00.000-05:00

Crooked Letter, Crooked Letter was a recommendation from the #TBC.

#TBC is the product of two other ladies and I discovering that we were consistently overlapping in reading material and tweeting about it. Somehow, someone decided that this should be the first selection for #TBC. And yes, I am aware of how nerdy this is.

Moving on. . .

Crooked Letter was one of the slowest building books I have ever read. By the time you reach the climax you are so numb to the idea of anything actually ever happening that there should be a word other than anti-climactic to describe this feeling.

The premise itself is interesting, but it just takes so long to get anywhere that is was clearly written for someone with more patience.

book list #27 - blue nights

2011-12-11T21:02:00.000-05:00

I read The Year of Magical Thinking at least once a year. For me, it's one of the strongest, most powerful books I've ever read. Despite the somber subject matter, I find it to be one of my book "safety blankets" (that topic is for another day)

Needless to say, I had extremely high expectations of Blue Nights.

The writing was impeccable. I love Didion's form, but overall, I found the story to lack the same emotional depth of The Year of Magical Thinking. Although the subject matter was just as serious and heavy, I just didn't feel it as much. It did not strike the same emotional chords.

Nan and the Louvre

2011-12-11T17:11:00.001-05:00

I'd already mentioned how much I love this photo by Nan Goldin.

This weekend, I finally got around to seeing the show.

I can't emphasize how incredibly beautiful it is.

Nan was able to spend time in the Louvre off-hours, barefoot, shooting. The resulting images and their pairings are artistic and stunning. I can't recommend the show enough.

The big collages are editions of 1, and when I overheard the price range, I nearly passed out. Guess I'll just be looking at these online, and hopefully at least one more time in the gallery.

book list #26 - rose of no man's land

2011-12-07T08:30:00.000-05:00

I really wanted to like Rose of No Man's Land. I read Chelsea Whistle years ago and really loved it, and always wanted to read Tea's other work.

This was not the right choice. It had all sorts of elements that I enjoy - adolescent drama, coming of age, the suburbs- but for me, none of it came together in a way that was at all enjoyable to me.I found it self-indulgent, slightly ridiculous, and overall pretty boring.

However, since I enjoyed Chelsea Whistle so much, I would still give her another shot.

book list #25 - peace meals

2011-12-06T08:02:00.000-05:00

For my birthday, I was gifted Peace Meals by my dear friend Khurram.

It took me a really long time to get through. Not because I wasn't enjoying it - I did really enjoy it. It took a long time because she wrote it in a way that forced the reader to digest the book slowly (no pun intended). Reading the book was a lot like having a meal in a foreign country - I was forced to take my time, I was made to read slowly. Reading slowly is not my strong suit.

Each story in Peace Meals tells a part of Anna Badkehn's life as a journalist. The things that she takes from each place are obviously much larger than recipes, and meals, but ultimately that is what she uses as her framework to tell her story.

It's an enjoyable book with ambitious recipes, mouth-watering, occasionally too long, food descriptions, and sweet tales of friendships.

book list #24 - birds of america

2011-12-05T08:03:00.000-05:00

I've read a lot of Lorrie Moore's stories over the years - both in her collections, and The New Yorker.

I don't know why it occurred to me so late that I'd never read Birds of America, but as soon as I did, I made sure it was a part of my next book order (as well as Self-Help)

Naturally, the stories were all classic Lorrie Moore stories, which is to say really ordinary people in mostly ordinary written about in a extraordinarily beautiful way.

I think anyone who enjoys her stories should read these.

book list #23 - a history of Ms.

2011-12-04T21:39:00.000-05:00

I read Inside Ms.: 25 Years of the Magazine and the Feminist Movement while preparing/researching for this piece.

I'm not going to lie, I don't do this for all my stories. More often than not, there is not enough time to do so, but also, I am not always this interested, or invested. In this case, I was both.

[I've talked about my history with feminism before, so I won't go into it again here]

Reading about the history of Ms. was really interesting, and Thom's style of writing made it such that it felt more like reading a really long article than anything else. I love that this magazine began in the magazine I work for. I love reading about their battles with advertisers. I love that all these talented, powerful women came together and worked insane hours and put out an incredibly important product.

You know that random dinner party conversation where people ask which decade you'd want to go back to?My answer is almost always late 60's, early 70's for the rise of feminism. I love the idea that I could have/would have worked for Ms. Magazine.

Obviously, this is a book for a very specific reader, and not really general interest, but I still highly recommend it.

book list #22 - eating animals

2011-11-13T15:41:00.000-05:00

I was raised a carnivore. Latino vegetarians are not the most common variety. Especially Argentine ones.

It took a long time for my grandmother to understand the vegetarian diet, on the rare, and then increasingly frequent lunch visits from non-family members. Vegetarians surely ate fish, right? Forget the look of consternation on her face when presented with a VEGAN.

I was part of the "animal rights club" for a year in high school and watched disturbing, grainy videos of slaughterhouses and then went home and ate whatever was presented in front of me.

I am a logical, rational, well-educated, well-read member of society. I know, and am friends with, a lot of vegetarians and vegans, all of whom made their choice for a variety of reasons. I have never, ever considered becoming a vegetarian. Rob gave up pork for a year, and I thought it was insane.

Then I read Eating Animals. If you are thinking this is where I announce my new, vegetarian ways, you would be wrong. It is much more complicated than that. . .as is this book.

Foer does a lot more than just say "slaughterhouses are bad" - he goes into the psychological, emotional, and very complex relationship we have with animals.

Why don't we eat dog? Why do we care more about their well-being than a pig which might actually be smarter than our cute little pitbulls?

There were chapters that literally made me sick to my stomach, and turned me off of meat for longer than I have ever turned away before.

Essentially, for me, the most important take away was to become an ethical eater. It's not something easy to do.

When friends e-mail about dinner parties and ask about dietary restrictions, it is really easy to say you have a peanut allergy or don't eat red meat. To say that you only eat ethically raised and treated protein, is prettty difficult.

By no means have I figured this all out. I try to keep my days meat-free. As much as economically possible, I only buy high-quality. farm-raised, local meats. Do I still eat meat? Of course. Am I more conscious of what I am putting into my body, and what must've occurred in order for me to enjoy that meal? Absolutely.

It was such a powerful book that I would recommend that everyone who EATS FOOD read it. That's a pretty serious rec, no?

book list #21 - way down in the hole

2011-11-10T09:55:00.000-05:00

The Girl Who Fell from the Sky felt like a really, really long short story. I mean that in the best way possible. Despite the fact that it was novel-length the words never felt wasted, or excessive. Everything was precise and compact.

The premise itself is dark. A woman throws herself and her children off a roof, and only one of them survive. A young boy witnesses the fall.

The strange part is that even though the event is epic, it is only a part of the story. The story is more about the young girl's identity. When the book was over, I was satisfied, but I could have kept going on the journey with the girl.

drool.

2011-11-10T00:22:00.000-05:00

if I ever have a country house, please let it have this bedroom. drapey fabric, skylight and all!

via, the very addictive, apartment therapy.

book list #20 - girl with curious hair

2011-11-09T09:49:00.001-05:00

I am not going to lie, part of the reason I was interested in this book was the fact that I really liked the title.

But ultimately, it didn't pan out. I just don't enjoy DFW's fiction as much as his non-fiction. The first piece was good, but the rest fell flat. I thought it was just me, until my friends confirmed this for me over the weekend.

Still. . .it is a really great title.

amazon linkage

Nan Goldin and angel.

2011-10-27T11:40:00.001-04:00

I absolutely love this photo.

link.

book list #19 - lucky peach!

2011-10-26T12:53:00.000-04:00

In honor of the fact that the NEXT quarterly, Lucky Peach, is almost out, I will finally post about the first Lucky Peach that I read at the beginning of the summer.

(I completely suck at blogging now)

It's awesome.

It helps that I am obsessed with food, culture, food culture, chefs, and travel. This has all of that PLUS Bourdain, and Wylie. All tied together with a Chang bow.

This was basically created with me in mind. I plan on making one of the awesome recipes from the back.

ALSO there is an AMAZING chart about eggs and temperature. (Shut up!)

book list #18 - just kids

2011-09-15T17:52:00.002-04:00

We decided at work, after reading The Hunger Games, that we would try to do a book club.

That failed, but the one thing that succeeded was that we all got Just Kids.

The most interesting parts of Just Kids, for me, was the development of Mapplethorpe's talent and all the New York City stuff. As a New York City-phile, anything about New York culture is awesome.

Otherwise, I thought it was a little tedious.

It was a little - and then I met this person who said this, and then I met this person, who did this, and then I met this person, and they did this. And so on and so forth.

It's a quick read though, so in my book it's a positive recommendation.

amazon.

*I am so incredibly behind that the time between when I read the next few books on my list and these posts is embarrassing. Bad blogger, bad!

book list #17 - the discomfort zone

2011-09-13T12:08:00.000-04:00

I needed to get back into the "Franzen Zone" - I really want to read Freedom, but I have such un-fond memories of The Corrections that I wanted to cleanse my palette first.

The Discomfort Zone is appropriately uncomfortable.

Franzen is so incredibly awkward. There is a lot of secondhand embarrassment reading this book, and also a little boredom.

I can't help it.

I am going to try to read Freedom and if I don't love it, then I am really really done with Franzen.

For serious this time!

9/11/2001

2011-09-11T13:57:00.001-04:00

Every year, I think I'll be able to write something about what happened that day.

Every year, I find myself starting then stopping and deleting or ripping a page or erasing.

These are the facts:

I was a junior in college. I had a creative non-fiction class that morning with Professor Valentine.

I saw the second plane hit on a television in the campus center and watched both the towers fall on a tv in the Dutch Quad office.

I watched students stream in crying. People whose parents worked in the buildings. One boy in particular who let out a noise I had never heard before, and haven't heard since, when the tower collapsed. (He later learned his mother was okay.)

I waited to hear from my family, to ensure everyone's safety.

My aunt, who worked downtown, was fine.

My grandfather who was down there, serving on grand jury duty, watched it happen and had to walk over 100 blocks uptown while we waited to hear that he was safe. I only recently learned that he hasn't been to the area since.

Meanwhile, in Albany, I locked myself in my room and stayed glued to the TV for hours. Eventually my suitemate, Erika, pulled me away.

By the end of the week, the times had become burned in my memory. . .8:46 am, 9:03 am, 9:59 am, 10:28 am.

That Friday, I got on a bus to come home for a funeral. There was still a cloud over downtown Manhattan.

I slept fitfully on the couch, tossing, turning and listening intently every time I heard a plane.

In the days, weeks, months following, I read everything that was written, I watched every special that aired. I felt like I needed to know everything.

I hated being away from home.

Those are the facts.

As a New Yorker, I will forever be altered by what happened in my city that day, while I was 3 hours away.

30. fin

2011-08-23T00:00:00.002-04:00

I did it.

30 posts over 30 days. It was a lot tougher than I thought it would be, but it was good to force myself to do it.

It was hard for someone like myself, who really enjoys blogging, but is also really wary of the vast world of the internets, to put so many things about myself out there.

I know that some entries were skimpy on content, but they were all very important in one way or another.

I had an earthquake on my birthday, in more ways than one (stop being dirty, I don't mean it THAT way)

Thanks for reading them all!

29. birthdays!!!

2011-08-22T08:47:00.042-04:00

When it's your birthday in my family, it is REALLY your birthday.

You wake up on the morning of your birthday and the entire apartment (and exterior hallways) would be covered in signs reading "happy [insert age here] birthday [insert name here]!!!!!" The signs would be everywhere, including taped in the fridge, or the toilet seat, or in the shower. It was always fun to find them in unexpected places.

We always had cake, sometimes more than one, over several days, a tradition I certainly continue to this day.

There were themed parties. Between me and my sister we covered all the bases - Alice in Wonderland, Hawaiian luau, 50's sock hop, the color purple (not the movie, the actual color), Wonder Woman, the list goes on. . .

My mother has a tradition of coming to my job with cake (in a boa) on my birthday.

I tend to make a lot of wish lists.

Personally, I believe my birthday should be the first and only national holiday in August.

Some people have even compared my birthday to another big birthday*

Here's a more recent history of birthday celebrations:

(birthday wand)

I should add that I really really love other people's birthday's as well. I love them. I love getting people balloons and presents and cakes and making awesome cards. Birthdays are AWESOME.

I find them almost as fun and exciting as my own.

28. in contention

2011-08-21T08:47:00.011-04:00

I am a photo editor who is not overly fond of photos of herself.

That being said. . .this is a strong contender for "favorite picture of myself ever"

Sure, there are some fabulous photos of me taken by actual professionals who have likely done a lot of retouching, but this just really speaks to who I am.

27. Family

2011-08-20T08:46:00.035-04:00

This is another epic, impossible-to-write post.

People who meet my family, who are drawn into my family, often tell me I need to write a book, or film a documentary. I've thought about filming us, but would need a very talented editor to handle the task of cutting it all down since we are a raucous bunch. My uncle's partner once described himself as Jane Goodall. (Charming, I know)

There are my grandparents, immigrants from Ecuador, who I've written about before.

I've also written about my crazy adventures with all the originals, holiday adventures,, my sisters (and the purple brush), and a lot about Froggy.

I feel lucky to have them all a short train ride away.

Even if they do have a charming nickname for me. . .Evil Princess. Evil, for short.

+ Crispy =

Photoshop by Julie.

26. RBM

2011-08-19T08:45:00.026-04:00

There is an entire blog worth of entries that could be written on the topic of the two of us.

The two of us being - Rob and Leonor.

We've been Rob and Leonor for almost half our lives at this point. Known each other for exactly half come this September.

We've come an incredibly long way, down a crazy, windy, rollercoaster-y path since this picture (our first together, although as friends, not a couple, we were months away from that):

I was the obnoxious, loud girl who boys only saw as a friend. He was the quiet sophomore transfer who had a few friends and rode around on a skateboard.

We got paired up for this project. A report on Brooklyn Heights. It included a on-the-street survey of people, photos, and lots of research. We spent a lot of time together. People got to talking. We got to thinking.

And now. . .

We take lots and lots of photos of each other, across the table is a very prominent theme. This happened to be at the same restaurant, on the same day, at almost the same time.

I couldn't think of a blog post that would encapsulate our relationship in any way. This certainly doesn't come close, but it's how I spend many of my days (sans camera in the face, that is). . .

across from the boy who let me steal his trig homework.

25. Froggy

2011-08-18T08:44:00.009-04:00

There are very few ways to explain the awesomeness of being an aunt. I think this picture really sums it up:

We drove through multiple states, for many many hours so that I could spend 36 hours with my brand new niece.

Anyone who knows me, asks me, talks to me, passes by me randomly on the street knows that she is my favorite person on the planet.

24. bee eff eff

2011-08-17T17:44:00.017-04:00

When we first met, we weren't particularly warm and fuzzy.

I thought she was slightly rude.

We got over it quickly. We became friends. She visited me in Rome while we were studying abroad. We became roommates. She was by my side during some of the hardest days of my life.

I gave the maid of honor speech at her wedding.

We are separated by almost 3 thousand miles and can go weeks without talking.

Doesn't matter.

We always pick up right where we left off.

23. tippity top

2011-08-16T08:43:00.006-04:00

this is one of my favorite photographs by one of my favorite photographers:

By Lee Friedlander

22. workity work work

2011-08-15T08:43:00.038-04:00

I am a very lucky person in that I really love my job.

It's hard to write that right now, as things have been extremely tough lately. I've had longer hours than usual and a tremendous amount of responsibility piled on.

Still, overall I really love it.

It's challenging, and exciting. I learn something new with every issue I work on. I get to work with the best photographers in the business, and the ones who will one day be household (well, industry names anyway)

I get to work on awesome things like this and this and this and this and this.

I also get to meet awesome people, like Pat Kiernan:

People often ask me how I got into my field considering my useless college degree in English with a concentration in Creative Writing. (How do they let people graduate with that degree?!?!?)

The answer is unexciting since it was mostly by accident.

I was working at one part of the newspaper as a freelancer. I made a good connection. I offered up my help to a young, overworked gentleman, who then remembered me when he was moving on. I started in the photo world knowing the name of only a handful of photographers, and knowing nothing about photography. I soaked it all up like a sponge. I wrote down every name. I looked up every site. It was the most intensive education in photography I could have imagined.

It was a very long process - I've written about that particular struggle before.

I still haven't figured out my current work-life balance, but knowing that I love my job 97% of the time means a lot.

21. paths

2011-08-14T07:43:00.016-04:00

I've always made this picture. I realized it a few years ago. There are more, back before I had a digital camera.

I've made them everywhere. These are from Brooklyn, Greece, London, & Spain.

(shot in the frame)

20. examples

2011-08-13T08:08:00.011-04:00

of why my grandfather is awesome. . .

19. the compound.

2011-08-12T09:07:00.014-04:00

I grew up on this corner, on this block. My mother grew up on this block from the age of 8. My grandparents immigrated to this block in the 60's.

I call it the compound now, since nearly my whole family lives within in a 5 block radius.

I grew up in the apartment next door to my grandparents. My bedroom window overlooked the avenue. The window is now blocked by trees.

There used to be a Fayva Shoes downstairs instead of the pharmacy. There was no weird cage for the trash.

People who watched me grow up still live on the block, and they wave when I come to my grandmother's weekly lunch (Saturday at noon - see you there)

I've lived other places - Albany, Rome, London - and would live other places for the short term, but this will always be home.

One of my favorite quotes is the following by The Wire creator, David Simon:

"There is no city more vain about it’s position in popular culture, more indifferent to other realities, more self absorbed than New York City"

I am pretttttty certain that he didn't mean it as a compliment, but damn sure I am taking it as one!

18. favorite.

2011-08-11T08:07:00.012-04:00

sometimes people think he is my brother, sometimes they think he is my boyfriend.

he's not either of those things, but he is "my favorite".

17. praise

2011-08-10T08:06:00.010-04:00

This has been the most significant article, the one that has resonated with me the most, of any article I've read in at least the last 5 years.

I feel very very strongly that I exhibit a lot of these traits, and that this was the way I was raised.

16. a dream

2011-08-09T08:06:00.006-04:00

If I won the lottery, after doing all the appropriate "I won the lottery" things like, buying a house, paying off debts, buying your mom a house, I would buy one of these prints (or all of these, depending on how much I won):

All by Abelardo Morell. I once looked into how much one would cost.

There is a very logical reason behind the title of this blog post.

15. If by Rudyard Kipling

2011-08-08T08:05:00.009-04:00

when I was 14, this was my favorite poem:

If

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

14. photo

2011-08-07T08:05:00.012-04:00

photo by Vincent Laforet.

first print I ever purchased.

very very big deal on my assistant's salary.

very very big deal on any salary.

I have never regretted my decision.

13. sisters

2011-08-06T09:05:00.010-04:00

my favorite picture of us.

my birthday dinner.

august 2010.

12. books

2011-08-05T08:04:00.027-04:00

I've always loved books.

As long as I can remember, I am never without one. I started reading when I was very very young, and used to ask my teachers to let me skip recess, and stay inside to read. (I was also very shy).

I would spend hours in the book store with my aunt Sandra. My aunt Elena would only buy me books as presents. I would spend entire days moving around the house, finding different, comfortable places to read.

I re-read books that I love over and over. The House on Mango Street, the Harry Potter series, Dangerous Angels, The Zahir, The Year of Magical Thinking, among others. I've tried, many times, to keep lists of the books I read. I never succeeded until I started blogging them.

I've keep my books organized by color, and then alphabetized (author's last name, then by title within author). I keep a digital record of them. It pains me when I loan someone a book and it takes an unnaturally long time to return it.

I can spend hours deciding which few books to get at the Strand. I always have to set a limit when I go there. I treat myself to an Amazon order every few months and pick off books from my wish list. (My birthday is coming up! Have at it!)

I tend to love the first book of every series the best. I love the entryway into a new world. I love learning and discovering about it.

This is my excited face when confronted with rows upon rows of used books in London (2004? 2005?):

11. on writing

2011-08-04T08:04:00.013-04:00

For years, I wrote. I wrote and wrote and wrote and wrote. I wrote poems, plays, stories. I wrote in my journal constantly.

I have stacks of notebooks - spiraled, composition, bound, cheap, expensive, plain, patterned, they run the gamut.

For many of those years, I always wrote these two things on the inside covers for inspiration.

"The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt" - Sylvia Plath

and an excerpt from Sandra Cisneros' The House on Mango Street

My Name

In English my name means hope. In Spanish it means too many letters. It means sadness, it means waiting. It is like the number nine. A muddy color. It is the Mexican records my father plays on Sunday mornings when he is shaving, songs like sobbing.

It was my great-grandmother's name and now it is mine. She was a horse woman too, born like me in the Chinese year of the horse--which is supposed to be bad luck if you're born female-but I think this is a Chinese lie because the Chinese, like the Mexicans, don't like their women strong.

My great-grandmother. I would've liked to have known her, a wild, horse of a woman, so wild she wouldn't marry. Until my great-grandfather threw a sack over her head and carried her off. Just like that, as if she were a fancy chandelier. That's the way he did it.

And the story goes she never forgave him. She looked out the window her whole life, the way so many women sit their sadness on an elbow. I wonder if she made the best with what she got or was she sorry because she couldn't be all the things she wanted to be. Esperanza. I have inherited her name, but I don't want to inherit her place by the window.

At school they say my name funny as if the syllables were made out of tin and hurt the roof of your mouth. But in Spanish my name is made out of a softer something, like silver, not quite as thick as sister's name Magdalena--which is uglier than mine. Magdalena who at least- -can come home and become Nenny. But I am always Esperanza. would like to baptize myself under a new name, a name more like the real me, the one nobody sees. Esperanza as Lisandra or Maritza or Zeze the X. Yes. Something like Zeze the X will do.

source.

10. a moment

2011-08-03T08:03:00.007-04:00

This is one of my favorite pictures of us.

It was taken at my uncle's wedding (or commitment ceremony) in 2005.

9. color-coded.

2011-08-02T08:03:00.039-04:00

In keeping with yesterday's theme of obsessions, today is about my particular obsession with color-coding/rainbows.

I love color-coding everything including my bookshelf. I've color-coded my planners my whole life (and now my g-cal), my clothing is organized by color, anything I can organize via Roy G. Biv is my favorite.

So much so that I have an entire file of photos from all over the internet of color-coded things.

Enjoy:

source.

8. obsession

2011-08-01T23:22:00.003-04:00

My best friend and I have a joke in which I am "kind of obsessive", but truthfully, when I like something, I realllllllly like something.

Here are some things I have been* obsessed with in my life:

*some of these obsessions may still apply

7. ice cream

2011-07-31T09:02:00.006-04:00

My mother has always told me that when she was pregnant with me, the only thing she wanted to eat was strawberry ice cream.

Call it subliminal messaging, or genetics, but every summer I crave strawberry ice cream like no other.

6. learning to salsa

2011-07-30T07:01:00.012-04:00

The first time I learned to salsa, I was 12 and spending the better part of my summer in Guayaquil with my family. It was no longer an option to sit to the side during parties, my dance card needed to be filled.

My aunt Sandra, my mom and I put in a tape (shuddup) of some of the most classic salsa, cumbia, and merengue and a bevy of aunts, uncles and cousins helped us along the way.

We practiced in my grandparent's concrete backyard.

Years later I had to relearn to follow. I've covered the topic before.

Photo by Kate Quarfordt

5. Stella

2011-07-29T09:01:00.045-04:00

I grew up with dogs. Our family is very very much pro-dog. In fact, they might be extreme. When I was growing up, my grandparents had 4 dogs in their apartment. Dogs are allowed on the couch, on the bed, anywhere they want.

We also had dogs in our apartment. A German Shepard, Gira, when I was a baby; a chihuahua named Chucky who we rescued when I was a pre-teen; and a big, messy mutt named Dixie for the better part of my high school and college years.

When Dixie died in 2001, we were all pretty devastated. She'd been seemingly healthy one day, and then the next day was blinded by a brain tumor.

A few years later, my aunt was very friendly with someone who worked at the ASPCA, and we mentioned that we would love to see any pit bull puppies that came through. (I am not sure what our reasoning was, we hadn't really talked about adopting a pet together)

On July 2nd, 2005, we got a call that a very cute, 10-week-old pit bull puppy was in and up for adoption. We went in "just to look"

We came home with a three-legged pit bull, who had a few health issues and no bladder control.

We got a training session and one year of doggie health insurance (which saved us thousands of dollars that year).

Most importantly, we got her:

Stella's First Day

We had no idea what we were getting into. Having a puppy is HARD WORK. It requires so much time and energy. We were up ridiculously early every day that summer, we

were arranging our social lives and schedules around a tiny little puppy.

Going into it all, I had no idea what it was to actually have a dog. The amount of time, and responsibility, was something I was utterly unprepared for. It certainly let me know that kids were a very very very long way off.

Stella looks like this these days:

She also has a sidekick named Moose:

2 dogs? A whole other story. . .

4. ****

2011-07-28T08:39:00.008-04:00

I am a nervous traveler. I don't love to fly. I hate the take-offs, I hate the landings, I hate being in my seat with the seatbelt unbuckled, I hate being in the bathroom, since i am convinced I will be in there if the plane goes down. Ever since LOST, I always carefully assess the other passengers on the plane for leadership potential.

I went to a place that inspired lots of anxiety.

I wrote about it here.

Two years later, I still can't seem to find the right way to explain what happened to me there. My life was incredibly different. I was between jobs, and seriously reconsidering my career path. Rob and I had just moved in together, marking a major change in our relationship. But I still feel like it would have affected me in the same way.

I just wish that after all this time, I had figured out what way that is. It's an odd feeling to have a transformative experience, without really knowing how you've been transformed.

A conversation I had while I was there stuck with me. . .

"Aqui en ****, estamos jodido, pero estamos feliz"

Translation - "Here in ****, we are fucked, but we are happy"

3. abroad

2011-07-27T08:39:00.032-04:00

In keeping with yesterday's theme of travel. . .

I knew when I started college that I wanted to study abroad my junior year. My very general major (English) made the options pretty limitless. I was certain I wanted to go to Europe, but wasn't sure exactly where.

I hadn't taken a language in college, but I would need to do so in order to go abroad. I thought about being lazy and taking Spanish, but I also thought it might be useful to learn another language. French seemed like the awesome, sexy option, but there was something about Italian; the similarities to Spanish, and how much I loved Italy the first time around. I visited the study abroad offices, looked at some brochures, and selected Rome. I applied, got in and it was all set.

It was all set, and then it was September 2001.

Suddenly, everything was uncertain. In particular, the idea of sending American students abroad, seemed very unlikely. I remember panicking at the idea of traveling, at the idea of leaving when everything seems so unstable, but I also remember being devastated by the idea of NOT going.

Luckily, I was still able to go, and in January of 2002, I boarded a plane to go live in Rome. It was one of the best decisions of my life.

It took a lot of adjusting, and home sickness was a very real thing that I hadn't thought would apply to me. I missed the ease in which life happened in New York. I never had to work my schedule around the mid-day closures of markets. I never had to walk to school because the bus drivers and tram operators were on strike (this changed, of course, years later when the MTA went on strike - in the WINTER). But for all the things that were difficult, there were so many more amazing things.

The food, of course, which is why after over two decades of never being able to put on any weight, I put on, easily, 10-15 pounds (I have never been someone who knows my weight, so I am guessing). Which on my frame made me look "chunky" for the first time in my life.

The city was awe-inspiring. Riding a bus in Rome, meant that when you looked out the window, you could see the Colosseum. Stroll down small, winding, cobblestone streets that open up into plazas with the Trevi Fountain. It never ceased to amaze.

I romanticize my time there, and for good reason. I was 20, had very little responsibility, and was living in one of the most beautiful cities in the world.

*P.S. Ultimately, there will be photos that go along with all these posts!

2. travel

2011-07-26T09:02:00.065-04:00

In Latin culture, it is typical, expected, for a girl to have a Quinceañera when they turn 15.

This was not even remotely interesting to me. I was shy back then, and did not particularly want all that attention focused on me. The same sentiments applied when it came to a Sweet 16.

Instead of parties, I asked my mother if she and I could take a trip together to Europe.

At this point in my life, I had already been out of the country. We'd been to Argentina when I was four, and spent three summers in Ecuador with my family, but this was a whole new world. It felt adult, mature, very sophisticated. I believed myself to be a writer, and had worked it into my head that you couldn't be a real writer without having been to Europe. (I have no idea how I picked up this idea, nor do I care to explore the psychology behind that).

I don't know how my mother did it, quite frankly. I know that the rest of my family was heavily involved in funding the trip because those European tours are NOT cheap, and we did not have that kind of money (or much money period), but she did.

We went to Rome, Venice, Lucerne, Paris, and London all via bus and train. We did all the most touristy things - the Colosseum, Big Ben, the Eiffel Tower, gondolas, can-can show, museums - and it was the most fun ever. Traveling alone with my Mom was a special, rare treat since having two younger sisters means always having to share your Mom.

We traveled during a time when there were still lire, francs, and Swiss francs. We spent lots of time converting colorful bills and counting coins.

Two significant things came out of this trip. The first being that afterwards, all I wanted to do was go away and travel (it would be years before I did this sort of trip again) but from the moment we landed, I knew that I wanted exploring to be a big part of my life.

The second significant part of this trip was that we were really lucky to have made some wonderful friends. A family - two sisters, their husbands, and their children - were on the same tour. We bonded very quickly. The moms and my mom got along as though my mother was the third sister, and I became friends with the two girl cousins. Together, we formed a huge gang, taking over the back of the bus for our own, exploring the cities together, taking photo after photo. It was what I imagine summer camp must be like.

The bond was a strong one, and we have remained very close over the last 15 (!!) years. Last year, I went to the wedding of one of the cousins. My mother still meets up with one of the moms for epic shopping excursions. They have become an extension of my already large family.

1. a compliment

2011-07-25T08:54:00.016-04:00

About a month ago, I met a woman named Marianne, who is Rob's colleague.

She had us over for dinner and we hung out on her roof afterwards and it was a GLORIOUS summer night.

Our conversations led us through a wide-variety of topics - dinner parties, travel, growing up in New York, family, etc. and at one point, I wish I could remember the story I was telling, she interrupted me to say the following:

You remind me of about 50 different novels.

As a book nerd, I found this to be the highest of compliments.

I don't often get along with people upon first meeting them (or you know, ever), but we even if we hadn't already been getting along so well at that point, this would have sealed the deal.

You remind me of about 50 different novels.

Naturally, the follow-up question should have been "which novels?", but we quickly were distracted.

Since she meant it as a compliment, I am assuming she doesn't mean American Psycho. The possibilities are endless. . .

30 for 30.

2011-07-24T08:00:00.000-04:00

This year, in 31 days, I turn 30.

In an effort to commemorate the special occasion (besides a party, which you are invited to), I wanted to do something more personal.

I've come to the realization recently, that the blogs that I am truly drawn to are those which give a glimpse into someone's actual life. Like Stacia's blog, or Joel's and while I am not really comfortable putting too much of my personal life out there on the internets, I do want to reflect on the last three (!!!) decades.

This is a very long-winded way of saying that for the next 30 days - starting tomorrow, once a day - I am going to be posting a story, an anecdote, a photo, something that is important, or significant in some way.

And don't worry - almost all of them are written and scheduled to post! No work excuses!

photo borrowed from the excellent ESPN series.

The Hunger Games

2011-07-09T16:37:00.000-04:00

I know, I know, but I explained myself! remember?

anyway, books #14, #15, and #16 were the The Hunger Games trilogy.

All of my most trusted recommenders - Rachel, GGG, EQ - had recommended this book. It went on my Amazon wish list in FEBRUARY (see below), but did I listen? Did I put it to the top of my list? No.

And then. . .one of the interns at work came in and was talking about the book with my work bee eff eff, and I became intrigued. I started book one on a Monday after a strong after work dirty martini. Four days later, after using every possible moment available to me - before work, after work - I finished the series.

Holy shit you guys - get into the games. Book 1 is amazing, and you don't think it can get better, but then IT DOES.

They are young adult novels which makes them really easy, quick reads. The writing is good enough and the story is just INSANE.

Kids fight to the death so that the people in their districts (similar to a town/borough) don't DIE OF STARVATION.

Once you are in that arena, there is no going back.

Plus there is going to be a movie. The book has spread like wildfire across the office and I am pretty sure there will be a big group of the staff that goes to see it on opening night at midnight in 2012. (God, such nerds)

KATNISSSSSSS! (you'll get it soon, promise. just go read the books)

Also, I'll need to know if you are Team Peeta or Team Gale as soon as you are done. Thanks!

clearly, I'm a slacker. . .

2011-06-15T13:44:00.001-04:00

# 9 - Game of Thrones - A Storm of Swords

nerd nerd nerd. so good. nerd nerd nerd.

# 10 - Game of Thrones - A Feast for Crows

more nerd nerd nerd. I can't wait for book 5!! Come onnnnnnnnnnnnnn already!

# 11 - Exit Narratives

I needed a break after such long books, and Exit Narratives was a break from length, but was extremely dense. I think teachers would really be interested in reading about the experiences of these teachers. I, myself, was more interested since I know the majority of writer/teachers and the school they taught in together was my own.

# 12 - The Secret History by Donna Tartt

Another epic-length book (576 pages) and completely engrossing. To tell you the plot line is ruining it a bit, but the setting is a small, liberal arts college in the northeast and the story is creepily believable.

#13 - Rape New York by Jano Leo

A chilling, straightforward account of the author's rape, and her rapist subsequent conviction. She tells the story so matter of factly that it feels more like a news article than anything. (Shout out to K.Ross for lending me the book)

next year. . .

2011-05-26T19:57:00.000-04:00

I am going to find the tallest person in the room and pose with them.

this year:

last year:

Both photos by Glenn Glasser.

back back back it up.

2011-05-20T14:25:00.001-04:00

It started slowly.

My computer would freeze here and there, it wouldn't communicate properly with the printer, programs would stutter and crash, the pinwheel of death would dance across my screen, but I never expected this.

Last Friday, May 13th (what up triskaidekaphobias!) IT took away my machine to do some tests. A few days later, I was told my hard drive had failed. They'd run 4 diagnostics - each one digging and destroying at my data, but it had failed.

Failed.

Failed at what?

It failed at preserving 10 months of e-mail including my correspondence with Pat Kiernan.

It failed at preserving 35 issues worth of (color-coded, meticulously organized) story folders, including inspiration and research files, estimates, shoots, final HR files, everything that goes along with a story.

It failed at saving hundreds upon hundreds of photographer files that I had been putting together since 2007 and carrying with me to each freelance position since 2008. I have a back-up from before I started last July, but in the months that I've been at such an awesome, inspiring place, I'd accumulated much much more. And all of it? It's gone.

All my perfected templates? Gone.

My color-coded, perfectly organized stickies? Gone.

My carefully organized restaurant publicists who I have to call non-stop? Gone.

Gone, gone, gone.

Now technically I could try to send the hard drive off to a world where they will continue to work on it some more and see if they could salvage something.

The costs would start at approximately $700, and that is one of the lower estimates. Since it was a 500GB hard drive, it would more likely be in the $1K range. Not to mention that none of this is guaranteed.

At home, my computer is connected to a monster hard drive and time machine diligently backs up my information at will, and on schedule. I have now decided to also back it up in the cloud somewhere.

As for all my professional things - they are gone. I don't happen to have 1K to spare on a potentially hopeless cause.

Time to rebuild, restart, recreate.

But let this be a lesson for you all at home - back yo' shit up.

a strong cookie update.

2011-04-29T20:48:00.000-04:00

today, my aunt asked me, "do you read anymore? because you haven't updated your blog in a while"

the answer is, yes, I still read.

I am reading the last book of the Game of Thrones series. I've read a book by retired teachers, I am going to read The Evolution of Bruno Littlemore next. I have a full Amazon cart that I am itching to press "buy" on. I am still reading The New Yorker every week. I'm reading countless blogs (thanks google reader!)

But what I am reading the most are e-mails and proofs and memos and drafts because right now my life is filled to the brim with work.

Yes, that sounds incredibly boring, but the truth is - I love my job. I'm obsessed with it. I am a minor workaholic, but it's because I feel so strongly and passionately about what I am doing. It leaves little time for much else. I am at a point in my life where I can devote a lot of my time to making my career awesome. I won't always be in that position (the time part - I will always be passionate about what I do - otherwise, why do it?) And you know what? My career IS awesome. I work on truly incredible things with insanely talented people and it is a true blessing to have that combination.

All this adds up to very little time for blogging, but I miss it, so when I do have time, I'll do a big batch and scatter them through that week.

I hope you'll still be reading.

And, by the way, I am still holding out hope for a date.

and this. . .

2011-04-12T16:38:00.000-04:00

see: my previous post.

#1 crush.

2011-04-09T18:17:00.000-04:00

my #1 teevee crush changes fairly. one reason being that I am fickle, the other being that I watch too much teevee.

the fact here is that my current crush has remained steady for quite some time, so I have to come out of the closet -

I am obsessed with Donald Glover.

Yes, this guy:

This is part of what started it:

and yes, now I own this mug.

and then this:

and THIS:

my god, THIS. IT IS STILL ON MY DVR. his expression at the end is so so so so so good.

anyway, the last time I wrote a blog post like this, this awesome thing happened:

the difference of course being that my crush on Donald Glover is NOT PLATONIC.

just sayin' - if you want to set us up on a date - I am 100% behind this.

book list #8 - four kitchens.

2011-03-27T18:46:00.000-04:00

I first met Lauren back in 2005 when she and I were both at T: The New York Style Magazine. We've kept touch after our brief overlap at the gray lady, and so when she took off for a year to write her book, I knew that ultimately it would be at the top of my reading list.

Reading Four Kitchens is exhausting. Don't get me wrong - it's a quick read, but reading about Lauren's kitchen experiences makes you long for a nap, and hope that she has since finally gotten a lot of sleep.

It's most likely because the book starts out at the famous wd~50 in NYC where Lauren put in hours that would have made me question her sanity had I known about it while it was happening.

Ultimately, the book is a fun, quick read, and for someone who loves food writing - really enjoyable.

see?

2011-03-23T08:14:00.000-04:00

I'm not the only one who does this!

source.

yes, I am aware she is all of 14 and an Oscar nominee, but that is beside the point. (also beside the point? the faces and awkward stances in every single picture I take)

*I mostly think I pull it off, no?

**Let the record state that MOST OF THE TIME, I do wear actual heels that make me super extra tall and then bring along the chucks for late night partying into the wee hours, okay?

addict.

2011-03-22T08:02:00.000-04:00

something horrible has happened.

I started playing angry birds on my iphone.

have you heard of angry birds? I'd been hearing about it for some time, but wasn't really that interested. at some point late last week I was waiting for something. I don't remember what, but I realized I had some time on my hands, so I downloaded the free app.

innocuous enough.

only not. I blew through the free app. . .and then I downloaded the paid version.

and now I can't stop playing.

someone please help me. I used to READ BOOKS AND MAGAZINES on the train. now I play a game where little birds with angry faces launch themselves at forts.

my insane sister apparently has already made it through all the levels and is going BACK over them all in order to get a perfect score.

book list #7 - for maddy.

2011-03-21T08:01:00.003-04:00

I'd been reading Matt's blog for quite some time when he got his book deal. I wasn't sure how much the book would differ from his blog, but I knew I would buy it, if only to support.

The format of his blog can sometimes be tiresome, but ultimately, the content is interesting enough to get past it. I don't remember how I found the blog, but I do remember that when I began reading and the story began to really unfold, my stomach dropped. It is such a devastating story that I couldn't stop reading.

Two Kisses for Maddy was a beautifully written book. Matt writes in a more traditional memoir-style and lays bare all the gritty details of his life with Liz, and then his life with Maddy.

I understand that the blog and the book are not necessarily for everyone - it can run the gamut from overly-sentimental to downright depressing, but the universal understanding with regards to loss transcends those things.

I always say that there are only 3 things that make me feel something - really old people, babies and animals.

So there you go - I read Two Kisses for Maddy and my one feeling felt something. To me that means there was something great in the book!

book list #6 - sisters.

2011-03-20T15:59:00.001-04:00

I read about Freud's Blind Spot in the New Yorker (maybe the blog?) at some point in the last six months and immediately put it on my amazon wish list. I have a long time fascination with the relationships people have with their siblings and the effects your siblings have on you as a person.

I thought Freud's Blind Spot was typical of most collections of first-person essays - some were phenomenal and some were so-so, but almost all painted a clear portrait of the relationship.

I love Peter Orner's essay in which he has his brother "fact-check" an event. Memory is so subjective - we all remember the same events in so many different ways. I think Jill and Faith Soloway's Q&A was a cute form, but it went on a tad too long for my liking.

Mary Norris' story about her brother becoming her sister was a highlight, as was Eric Orner's comic-style entry.

Anyway, I highly recommend it and use it as an excuse to wax poetic about my own siblings.

My sibling situation is complex, but not anymore so than any of the many many "blended" families that are around these days. I'll focus on my blood-relations, although I feel very strongly in the importance of the family that you create versus the one you are born into.

My mother married a man 16 years older than her, who was already divorced and had two sons. I spent the first 8 years of my life riding out to Brighton Beach in a shiny Cadillac, being car sick the whole way to visit with my older brothers.

J, eight years older, always seemed very adult. P, four years older, less so. both of them seemed so. . .boyish. Growing up in a Latin family meant that gender roles were firmly enforced. Girls wore dresses, had long hair, and didn't get dirty. Boys were rough, played sports, and had toy cars. We had very little in common. There was a lot of food consumed and a lot of boardwalk time in the summer. Their mother adored me and was always overwhelmingly kind despite a deep-seeded (and well-founded) hatred of my father.

Once they moved to Miami, I saw them less and less. P got married and had two kids. In high school I longed for the older brothers portrayed on TV and movies - mildly over protective with hot friends who I could date. Ultimately, we are not really very close, but if either of them ever needed a kidney, I would not hesitate.

Then there are my sisters. I was the first born. Three years later, Christie came along, and five years after that, there was Mandi.

Christie and I spent our entire childhood in a silent and not-so-silent war. We were as different as can be - we still are. I remember thinking that she wanted to do everything I did, have everything I had, and hating every second of it. I toed the line between being outright mean and completely freezing her out. I had to move out for our relationship to make any significant advancements. Coming home from college was fraught with issues - mainly who got the phone, but somehow leaving always managed to make it a little bit better.

I was a fully formed person when Mandi was born. I remember her being born early and having to spend a lot of time in the hospital. I remember the night she came home vividly. There was a fire in the building, a parallel neither of us were happy to see play out 20 years later. By the time she was old enough to be interesting, I was gone - away at college, living in London, in my own apartment. Our overlap time was short, but sweet. We bonded over Gilmore Girls and pop music. She was my little sister in every sense of the word.

Now the three of us are a tight-knit nightmare (for those around us). It took time, and in some cases, distance to become that way. We are close in ways that people envy, and also seem to find suspicious. I think that having sisters is a big part of my staunch woman positive/feminst views. I've tried to pass along all the positive things I've learned, and in general, just tried to be the best role model I could possibly be.

Personally, I think we all turned out pretty okay. . .

Christmas 2010 - me, Crispy, Mandi with Froggy front and center.

book list #5 - pretty pretty princess day.

2011-02-28T07:49:00.001-05:00

For the last two months my brain has been filled with weddings.

Yes, you read that correctly.

No, I am not getting married.

Instead, I was tapped to edit the Summer 2011 Wedding issue of my magazine which means the last two months have been filled with cakes, dresses, flowers, receptions and brides. As someone who has very very strong views about marriage it was quite a challenge. I came close to meltdown a few times. My good friend Alice pulled me out of the depths once with this gem:

Focus on the pretty, don't go all Black Swan. That is your mantra.

The issue is out in March - it's not exactly casual reading for a non-bride-to-be, but I assure you that the photography will be awesome! The best ever, really, in my oh-so-humble opinion.

Anyway, this is a long way of leading into the next book on my book list, Rebecca Mead's One Perfect Day. I put it on my wish list soon after reading that my buddy Joel read it. I hadn't heard about it and I had just been given the weddings assignment, but it was clearly right up my alley.

In the last two months, being immersed in this culture has just reinforced my beliefs about weddings. You should not spend your down payment on your one "pretty pretty princess day", especially if you are doing it because you think it is what you are "supposed" to do.

I digress.

One last thing before I focus on the book. One of my favoritest people, Roxy, said on the day that I was given this assignment, "this is like the beginning of a romantic comedy!" We have since commenced the casting of this movie. All casting recommendations are welcome.

Thanks.

Okay, so, the book:

I enjoyed it. It lost my interest in bitsy places when it was just a little dry, but over all, it was a really frank observation of the industry.

I think it is perfectly, succinctly, wonderful, perfectly summed up with this one line -

"You are selling dreams, and you can charge anything"

Selling dreams is a very lucrative business.

once upon a time. . .

2011-02-26T14:34:00.000-05:00

there was this site called "myspace"

You might have heard of it.

I, like many other people I knew, had a profile and pictures and all that jazz. Yes, I already had facebook, but all these people were on myspace and I hate to be left out of the social networking loop. (Except foursquare! I can't bring myself to check in places - I just can't!)

Anyway, back then I also started utilizing this myspace "blog" thing. It started out as not much at first, but became my first public self-indulgent blog platform.

I have really wanted to delete that account for years now, but there is no option to export the blog.

Which is why I am writing this post. . .

for those of you who subscribe to my RSS, I'll be copying the posts in and backdating them to match the myspace date. I realize this may be annoying, but I'd like to have all my public ramblings in one centralized location.

For those of you who read this who have no idea what an RSS is - let me google that for you.

This, at the very least, should be mildly entertaining for you and truly embarrassing for me.

book list #4 - history.

2011-02-21T09:45:00.000-05:00

Wanna know a not-so-secret secret?

I am a closeted romantic. Granted, my romanticism comes with a lot of strings (naturally), but ultimately, I think I can be classified as a (very very) cynical romantic.

Now that we got that out of the way, I can say, without holding back, that I really enjoyed The History of Love. I tend to love books within books (which this has) and anything of that ilk, but I also just really enjoyed the storytelling. I thought Krauss handled the passage of time really elegantly and ultimately effectively. There is an entire passage on page 11 that I think is one of the most effective examples of this. I read it over and over about 10 times before moving on.

There are also really lovely lines like:
He saw Alma one last time. He had no idea it would be the last. He thought everything was just beginning.

My only issue is that there were a few dangling threads at the end that I wish had been tied up. Otherwise, I recommend it - it's a very quick read.

book list #3 - letters.

2011-02-20T14:45:00.004-05:00

The premise of What I Know Now was filled with promise. . .unfortunately, ultimately, it fell flat. The intentions are great - letters by successful women to their younger selves. Who wouldn't like to give themselves advice?

The thing it DID do was pique my interest about some of the incredible women who were included. I would love to read a biography by Cokie Roberts or Ann Curry or Joyce Tenneson.

The book was just the tip of the iceberg, but unfortunately that's all it was.

Enjoy your blurry, closed-eye snapshots, sir. You have earned them.

2011-02-15T13:30:00.001-05:00

This is worth the almost 5 minutes. Really.

happy valentine's day!

2011-02-14T00:01:00.000-05:00

hope your day is filled with twinkly heart lights. most likely the metaphorical kind.

source.

this is what. . .

2011-02-13T18:23:00.000-05:00

51 years together looks like:

has it been perfect? far from it.

but 51 years later with 5 kids, their partners, 4 grand-kids, and one great-grand, who all happily spent a Sunday together eating breakfast and hanging out? I'd call that successful.

wouldn't you?

powerful.

2011-02-12T11:05:00.000-05:00

there are some incredibly powerful images in the winners gallery for World Press Photo.

Here are some of my top picks:

It's worth it to click through the link above to really see the photos since my screengrabs don't do them justice.

ALSO, a very awesome, special shout out to Ben who won first place in the Nature stories category!

Couldn't happen to a nicer, more talented dude.

hypnotic.

2011-02-10T17:34:00.002-05:00

January 2011 - the pictures.

2011-02-01T07:34:00.002-05:00

I told myself I would do a picture a day this year, but this is much harder than it seems (for me). I am very bad at this. Very very bad. This is my best try for January. I hope February will go better:

January 1st:

expensive champagne watching the ball drop

January 3rd:

writing my authors post

January 5th:

moose

January 7th:

snowglobe-y at work

January 8th:

roof art

January 8th:

van heusen

January 9th:

taking down the tree

January10th:

work hell

January 11th:

the perfect savory scone

January 13th:

the morning after (2 years to the date I signed the contract)

January 16th:
the most amazing wool socks ever.
(no, I do not have two right feet. one is mine, one is his)

January 17th:
fairway, red hook

January 21st:
switching desks

January 22nd:
play-doh with froggy

January 23rd:
instead of a photo

January 26th:
running an errand in the snow

January 27th:
franklin ave.

January 29th:
sleepover

January 30th:
shadows and shadow makers.

Also, speaking of pictures, my niece Froggy now has a photo blog (I edit it for her)

misty water-colored memories.

2011-01-24T07:48:00.000-05:00

I've been cleaning out my old bedroom in my mom's apartment, and she is cleaning it out which means lots of quality time with my mom, dust and boxes of stuff.

It will take a few days of sifting through things, but today I got rid of two bags worth of crap and at some point will have to sort through hundreds (no joke - it's literally hundreds) of pictures.

I complained to my mother that this is why people live in the suburbs. When you live in the 'burbs, you have attics where your kids can leave their shit and their kids can find it and laugh about it later. Alas, we're from NYC, so no attics for us.

I started with this trunk:

I found cassette tapes:

VHS tapes (sports and Dawson's Creek), college newspapers from when I was the co-news editor, tons of materials from the Vagina Monologues, my mini disc player and mini discs, maps and ticket stubs from every trip I've ever taken, printed AOL (!!) e-mails, stacks of cards from Rob, journals and writing books spanning HS and college:

the list goes on and on and on. . .

I imagine there will be some hysterical things posted on this blog in the next few weeks as soon as I start scanning things.

15 authors.

2011-01-23T15:04:00.000-05:00

I was once "tagged" on facebook to list 15 authors who have influenced me and that always stick with me. The idea was to do it as quickly as possible, so as not to over think it. This means, of course, that after compiling the list, I have been over-thinking it.

In no particular order:

Sandra Cisneros
The House on Mango Street is still one of my favorite books. For years, on the inside cover of all my journals I would transcribe an entire portion of the book, "My Name" as inspiration. The opening line is something I quote often, "In English my name means hope. In Spanish it means too many letters." I related to her "otherness", her not fitting in-ness. It all felt familiar.

When I first began writing, my style was quite clearly influenced by Ciseneros. I would write these short pieces hoping to capture what she can capture in just a few hundred words. I don't think I ever quite succeeded the way she did, but damned if I didn't try.

She wrote this particularly poignant line that I used as a writing prompt over and over:

I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

I mean really? Perfection.

Sonia Sanchez
This woman is a powerhouse. When I started doing spoken word, I began obsessing over all the incredible women who were writing these incredibly powerful pieces - Sonia was my number one obsession.

Just the titles of her books were inspiring to me:
like the singing coming off the drums
Homegirls and Handgrenades
shake loose my skin

Both she and Saul (see below) need to be heard to be believed. She is a tremendous orator.

That being said she writes haikus that are like swift kicks in the gut. She talks about writing them here.

Saul Williams
Another one of my post-spoken word obsessions, Saul writes poems that are just unbelievable. His word play is accessible, but it still thoughtful.

Seriously? This line:
if I could find the spot where truth echoes
i would stand there and whisper memories of my children's
future

just watch these and then you'll understand:

Paul Auster
I first read City of Glass in college. I loved it and began reading any Auster I could get my hands on. A few years later, I was living in London and bought Oracle Night. It's about writers and writing. It's a book within a book. It was a story that was both very very familiar and also very foreign, but completely relatable.

Paulo Coelho
Approximately twice a year, I re-read The Zahir. Every time I read it, I take away something new. I was introduced to Paulo by a wonderful friend of mine, Sara, who I was pen pals with - actual letters in the mail! - for close to seven years. She gave me the really wonderful The Alchemist for a birthday one year (we always exchanged books). Several years later, Rob's sister had a copy of The Zahir and since I loved my first foray into Coelho, I gave it a try.

He is not for everyone, but those who love him take it to a whole other level. I am not quite on the obsessive level as those fans, but I do reread The Zahir whenever I need to. There are very few books in life, I think, that one needs to reread every year. Maybe I'm wrong?

There is a very large spiritual element to all of his books, and while I do not consider myself very religious, I do think that I am always searching, and reaching out for a spiritual connection to something. A lot of his books are about that very thing.

During the summer of 2009, Rob and I went on a really important trip, and I took with me a copy of The Pilgrimage. I made Rob read it as soon as I was done. The way it paralleled what was going on in our lives at that very moment almost turned me into a crazy Coelho follower. Common sense prevailed, but the experience never left me, and I will always carry those two things - the trip and the book - together.

Dave Eggers
When I first read A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius in college, I became the number one Dave Eggers fan. I convinced as many people as possible to read it. I loved his (admittedly) self-indulgent writing style, the long footnotes, the pop culture references. I knew lots of people who hated his writing style, but I loved all the quirkiness, especially the "Rules and Suggestions for Enjoyment of This Book". This is another book that I think I would like to reread now from a slightly older perspective.

Amy Bloom
The stories in Amy Bloom's collections are personal. Deeply personal and touching. Some of my personal favorites are A Blind Man Can See How Much I Love You, Love Invents Us, and Come to Me. All of them are really strong collections which is not always the case with books of short fiction. There are almost always duds. Bloom manages to sidestep that by making each story unique and fully formed.

Francesca Lia Block
This is another book that was gifted to me by my dearest Sara. At the time this was the writer I wished I could be - dreamy and whimsical and silly and fun - but those were not my strengths in the slightest, so instead I devoured Dangerous Angels over and over again.

I underlined entire paragraphs and starred entire pages until the whole books looks like someone was studying it for a final exam.

This still ranks up there with my tippity-top favorite lines:
A kiss about apple pie a la mode with the vanilla creaminess melting in the pie heat. A kiss about chocolate, when you haven't eaten chocolate in a year. A kiss about palm trees speeding by, trailing pink clouds when you drive down the Strip sizzling with champagne. A kiss about spotlights fanning the sky and the swollen sea spilling like tears all over your legs.

Who doesn't want to be kissed like that?

Ann M. Martin
I started reading at a very young age. It is now a well known fact by most people I know that when I was a kid, I used to bring books to parties. (I KNOW). I have always loved reading. I've always loved escaping into another world for hours and letting everything around me disappear for a bit. My mother actually used to get ANGRY at me for reading so much. She used to say that the house could be burning down around me and I wouldn't even notice because I was too into my book.

One of my first big obsessions was The Baby-Sitters Club. I was absolutely insane about them. I bought them all - the regular books, the super specials, the special "chain letter" book that had actual letters inside envelopes in the book (amazing!)

My aunt Sandra used to take me to the 83rd St. Barnes & Nobles to buy the latest books and then I would race home and devour them. One of the babysitters was from New York and had diabetes and I was so into her character that I was convinced that I had diabetes (I didn't/don't).

I don't remember when I stopped reading them, I think I just did. I do know that they are in a closet at my mom's and if anyone wants them - let me know!

George Perez
Nerd alert. Nerd alert. When I was growing up, my uncle was obsessed with comics. (He still is.) Since he is only ten years older than me, I thought he was so cool and was really into whatever he was into. It took a long time for me to convince him to let me into this world of comics, but ultimately, there I was - reading Teen Titans. Technically he didn't write all the books I remember becoming really interested in, but he was the one my uncle thought was awesome, so I did too.

Being a female and a comic fan has certainly gotten me a certain brand of attention in my life - I dare you, anyone with breasts, go to Midtown Comics on a Wednesday. You will feel incredibly out of place. Either way, I enjoy putting people in line when they make stupid and uninformed comments about basic cannon (especially Batman and Wonder Woman related)

Besides comics are awesome - Teen Titans was my gateway drug.

Gabriel Garcia Marquez
When I first started reading One Hundred Years of Solitude, I referred to it as 100 Years of Reading. The pace killed me slowly, the characters too many. I couldn't stand it. It was one of the first books that I did not finish (I was a compulsive finisher before that). I knew that I couldn't give up on Marquez, so I moved on to Love in the Time of Cholera.

It's hard to explain how much I loved this book other than by saying - I felt like I was holding my breath the entire time I was reading it. I felt so deeply for Florentino from the very beginning.It was one of those books that as I was reading, I hated to NOT be reading it - it felt as though the story was going to continue on without me (you know, like the Sims, but literary).

Sylvia Plath
I've mentioned my obsession with Sylvia Plath before. I won't go into it again here, but I think this year I am going to reread her diaries. Bear with me people!

Margaret Atwood
Cat's Eye and The Edible Woman were the perfect books at the perfect time. I feel like I am at a point where I should reread them and see if they still strike a chord with me the way they did then. At the time, reading these books, felt very important and meaningful.

Joan Didion
The Year of Magical Thinking did a number on me. When I read it I absorbed it deeply. At that point I had not really lost anyone that was very close to me, but the book stuck to me. It stuck in the deep recesses of my brain because when I did lose someone, it was one of the first things I reached for. I consider that to be pretty significant.

J.K. Rowling
Oh Harry Potter. I came to the Harry Potter world a teensy bit later (after book 2 but before book 3) and instantly fell head over heels. The first book is so good that it is one of my annual rereads - if I am having a tough day/week/month there are a few things that can help me out of it - HP Book 1 is one of them. I get it though - if you are not on the Harry Potter train, you are NOT on it and you do not understand why grown ass people wait in line for 4+ hours to get a book at midnight and then go home and stay up all night reading it only to be pissed off that they have to wait FOREVER for the next one.

Not that I did that or anything.

So there it is. This took a lot longer than I thought it will and while writing it I thought of a few other authors that could have been listed, but I still stand by my initial list.

imagine!

2011-01-22T05:27:00.000-05:00

When I started working at my newest magazine, I transferred over my subscription to my good friend who was moving to Oklahoma City. (I am so. nice.)

This has led to the existence of "Bizarro Leonor".

Exhibit A:

No one who has ever known me for any amount of time - 5 minutes, 5 days, 5 months, 5 years, 5 lifetimes - would EVER be able to picture me living in the midwest (is OKC the midwest?)

I think Bizarro Leonor is definitely a pediatrician and is absolutely married with a spawn. Bizarro Leonor also owns a dog AND a cat, but the dog is still definitely a pit bull.

Bizarro Leonor is maybe even a vegetarian - naaaaah - let's not get crazy.

pyramid of greatness.

2011-01-21T18:19:00.000-05:00

new rules to live by:

click to enlarge.

hee. I typed "enlarge"

5 people.

2011-01-18T11:24:00.000-05:00

I have been meaning to write this post for ages, and then kept putting it off because it seemed so narcissistic, but then a few things happened:

1. I realized I have a blog, so wtf do I care about narcissism?
2. Rob and I had a blast "casting" a movie of our friends the other day, and it reminded me of this.

Sooooo. . .here you go!

In my day to day life, I get a lot of "you look just like so-and-so"

Most of the time, I am all - "are you on crack?", but say "thank you" and move on because generally it is meant as a compliment.

Here are, in reverse order of frequency, the actresses people say I look "just like!"

#5 Drew Barrymore
I once had a super flaming boy run over to me at a party and yell, very loudly, "oh my god! you look just like Drew Barrymore. I loooove her. you HAVE to hug me." This was the oddest incidence of "you look just like so-and-so", but not the first time I'd heard this comparison to Ms. Barrymore.

I am pretty sure it's the strong nose (aka awkward nose) and maybe the lips.

Maybe it's this shot they are thinking of instead?

#4 Uma Thurman
Since I was approximately 14, a family friend of mine has called me "Uma", and she has insisted that other people call me "Uma". I do not know why other than the fact that we are both tall. Does that count?

Sadly, I think this happens to be another case of the "strong nose" comparison. I wish the shot above was the Uma I looked like!

#3 Rachel Weisz
No one ever ever ever remembers poor Rachel Weisz. They always say, "you look like an actress. she's British. I can't remember what movie she was in. . ." as they trail off and look at me expectantly. When I give them nothing, they usually say, and are usually ashamed, "I think she was in The Mummy?" Then I feel free to put them out of their misery and say her name. I think they think we look alike because we both have wavy brown hair and maybe the squinty eyes?

I am at a loss with this and chalk it up to random tall woman with brown hair (I blame that on most of these comparisons, as you can see).

#2 Winnie Cooper
Ah yes, Winnie Cooper. No one thought I looked like Winnie Cooper when I was young, but now, as an adult, I get a lot of "you look like the girl from The Wonder Years!"

I always assume (correctly) that they are referring to this version:

and not this version:

Okay Winnie. . .poor Kevin missed out!

#1 Katie Holmes

Oh how this has "plagued" me. When Dawson's Creek started, I was a junior in high school who was in love with her best friend. My friends thought it was HILARIOUS that I looked "just like Katie Holmes!" I ignored them. My grandmother saw a picture of Katie Holmes in TV Guide and ripped it out to show everyone that there is an actress who looked just like me. I rolled my eyes. When my godson got a little older he would see the commercials and say that it was me. I thought it was charming. However, the first year of that show, strangers on the street stopped to comment, to mention, to tell me, that I looked "JUST LIKE JOEY!" (yes, this really happened, more than once, in fact it happened more times than I could count)
By time time I graduated, everyone in my major (yes, a major in HS) was calling me "Joey". Parts of my yearbook are written out to "Joey". Yes, there are worse things. No, she is not ugly, but my life was consumed by this comparison. At the time, it seemed like a bigger deal - mostly because I was 16.

The comparisons have (mostly) stopped post-Cruise-ified Katie, but every so often I still get it.

BONUS:

#Really!?!? Cameron Diaz

I look nothing like Cameron Diaz who has blonde hair and blue eyes, and a decidedly California look:

not even when she is a brunette do we resemble one another:

Yet there are two people in my life who are INSISTENT that I look just like her. One of those two says that I speak (?!?!) just like her. A few other random people have noted some sort of comparison. Clearly, they must be thinking of THIS version of Cameron Diaz:

Am I right?!

And now that I have posted this completely self absorbed post, you will start to think "oh my god! she does look like so and so!"

Let's hear it folks - who are your (annoying/flattering) comparisons?

book list #2 - a.munro

2011-01-17T09:23:00.001-05:00

Too Much Happiness, the latest Alice Munro, was not filled with very much happiness at all.

The first story was depressing and the rest of them didn't get much happier. As usual, Munro's writing was excellent. I had read at least half of the stories before, but I have never minded rereading anything she writes.

She has some stories with really surprising twists, and lots of beautiful, quiet moments.

I will always recommend Alice!

a few things.

2011-01-16T15:48:00.008-05:00

1. Why are they eliminating all the women off Top Chef?

Casey, Jamie (thank goodness), Tiffany - all in a row! I don't think Hootie-Hoo can win it all, and I want a female winner!

2. In the same issue of the New Yorker there were these two lines, in two pieces:

Though who’s to say when anything begins really?

in the fiction piece.

Ferran’s question still counts: How do we finish the meal? But then how do we finish anything?

in this piece about dessert.

I have been thinking about it ever since. We don't know when things begin or finish?

3. This issue is amazing - debate it all!

I have been trying to decide all my winners, and have struggled with some, but some are obvious.

Athlete: The Messiah

Year: 1981

Book: Sophie's Choice I cannot possibly decide!

TV Show: see above. (I must discuss with my Sister Neu)

Musical: I don't really do Broadway enough to decide this fairly.

Mayor: LaGuardia

Building: I have soft spots for the Chrysler and the Empire State.

Film: Woody Allen anything - Manhattan, When Harry Met Sally, Annie Hall

Song: Would be "Empire State of Mind" if damn Alicia Keys wasn't on it, instead I'll go with Sinatra's "New York, New York"

book list #1 - game of thrones

2011-01-16T09:05:00.001-05:00

Interestingly enough, my first book this year was read on Ike (my iPhone).

I have long resisted the ebook - it is simply not for me. I love the texture of books, the weight, the smell, I like the sense of satisfaction as I make my way through.

However, George Martin's series is infectious and I don't actually see them as a reread possibility, so I downloaded book number 2, A Clash of Kings, and got to reading.

I assume that the pacing would be better on a larger reader - kindle, ipad - because the tiny iphone screen meant I was scrolling annoyingly often.

The book itself was a great second part to what I hope will be a fulfilling series. Also - the deaths keep piling up! For a few chapters, I was wondering how the story would even be able to continue!!

2010, a book list.

2011-01-03T19:25:00.001-05:00

My friend Joel inspired me to keep a list of all the books I read in 2010, so I did.

My official list stands at 31 total which seems really low to me, and something I would like to improve upon for next year.

Then I was thinking I should also add to this list:

47 issues of The New Yorker, and 42 issues of New York Magazine.

I have to say that those should count for at least one or two more books on my total count for the year, but I am not really sure how to calculate such a thing - Joel?

I should also add to the list the various books I reread each year, but I definitely don't think those really should go towards the final tally.

The Zahir, Dangerous Angels and Necklace of Kisses, HP Books 1, 6 & 7, The Year of Magical Thinking, House on Mango Street. I also usually reread a Paul Auster, an Amy Bloom, and a Jonathan Lethem - this year they were, Oracle Night, Love Invents Us, and Fortress of Solitude.

I want to make it to at least 40 this year, at least. If you ever want to buy me a book, feel free to pick one off my wish list or send me one of your favorites to borrow! I'll return it promptly and in excellent condition!

*ETA - I realized I also didn't count the last few graphic novels I read - I have to be more diligent this year!

design of a decade, 2000-2010.

2011-01-03T14:46:00.000-05:00

sorry for the late posting, but I was hoping to get this to be more robust photo-wise. unfortunately, work was not as slow as I would have hoped so there was little energy for blogging in the evening, much less scanning. one day I will be a better (aka more dedicated) blogger!

1 BA earned while doing my time upstate.

worked at 7 magazines:

New York Times Magazine, T Magazine, GQ, Money, More, New York, and Men's Vogue

2 dogs adopted:

1 niece born to rock my world:

3 very important weddings attended:

I lived in 4 cities. . .

and 5 apartments. . .plus a few dorm rooms:

and visited 17 countries:

I had my photo taken by Bill Cunningham 1 glorious time:

went nuts at 3 Madonna concerts:

1, 2, 3

I suffered 2 very important losses:

had 1 truly great love:

made some amazing, long lasting, incredible friendships:

and I went from a girl to a woman, even though I am still, mostly, ridiculous:

Here's to another decade of sassiness!

oops!

2010-12-31T13:57:00.000-05:00

a post that was not supposed to go up went up moments ago.

sorry to all you who subscribe to my feed! that post is not quite ready yet!

2010, it happened.

2010-12-30T16:52:00.000-05:00

Last year, I wrote a list of things that happened in 2009, and before that 2008. In the spirit of consistency, I should write a list of things that happened in 2010. . .

but I don't really feel like it.

Simply put, the facts are these - I got a really incredible job which challenges me on a daily basis - in all the ways a job should. I work for an incomparably passionate and brilliant boss who inspires everyone around to be greater, and I am thoroughly grateful for this.

My Froggy has grown into an even smarter and charming kid than I ever thought possible. I am the proudest aunt on the face of the planet. I look forward to watching her become even more amazing.

My life in 2011 will be unrecognizable in terms of the changes it will bring, and it is impossible to foresee how it will all pan out, but it will because that is what it does and this is what it is:

image source.

here is to filling pages.

book list #31 - nerd, nerd, nerd, nerd.

2010-12-28T14:13:00.000-05:00

My friend Erik and I have begun a nice tradition of recommending awesome things to each other - I got him hooked on Veronica Mars, and now he got me hooked on A Game of Thrones, or rather the A Song of Ice and Fire series.

I have been desperately trying to wrap up my book list for this year and then I started reading this 835 page monster (which I carried on the train with me!) and couldn't put it down. Ms. "I don't love the kindle and won't drink the kool-aid" downloaded the kindle app for her iphone and then downloaded the SECOND book as soon as the first was finished. How I like reading it on the kindle is a whole other conversation/blog post.

This book is pure Lord of the Rings/Harry Potter fantasy style. There are a billion characters to keep track of and somehow they are either related or have screwed each other over or are at war or were at war. It is a lot of stuff, but the drama is consuming. Also, *mild spoiler alert* NO ONE is safe.

Erik put it best after I sent him a faux-angry e-mail:

It's kind of like the wire of fantasy novels
No one is safe

(Yes, a Wire reference - you see why we are friends now)

I am usually really open with my nerdiness, but posting this has really elevated me to a whole new brand of nerd.

Make fun of me if you will (and I would), but this book is highly entertaining. Plus HBO is turning it into a series!

amazon link.